Small Town Joys

Many years ago, my first husband and I decided that we wanted our children to grow up in a small town. We loved the idea of knowing our neighbors and how we would always have people looking out for our kids. There's also something special about going into a local store and always seeing a familiar face.

This afternoon, Nicholas and I visited our local dollar store. I saw three students from my school and was filled with joy seeing them with such big smiles on their faces. I love running into students! While walking through the store, I noticed a man talking to two of the children. He excitedly commented on the boys telling their mom they loved her. Then, he surprised them with money. I'm not sure if it was a dollar or a coin.

One of the workers walked by me and commented on how sweet he is and how much she enjoys having him in their store every day. She even said that if he doesn't show up, she worries about him. It is part of his normal routine to visit our dollar store. It saddened me to hear that some people find him annoying and don't like him hanging around. Sure, he interrupts your "quick" shopping trip, but he is so sweet to the kids.

Months ago, this same man played out a similar scene with Jennifer. He commented on how pretty she is and magically found a dollar for her. She still talks about him and gives him a hug when she sees him.

As I left the store and head back home, I thought about how nice it was to hear someone say how much they enjoy him. The employee could've run him out of the store and told him to leave the kids alone. Instead, she embraced his uniqueness and welcomed him. I can only dream that, years from now, I'll find someone just like her that enjoys Jennifer's presence just as much.

Too often, we allow ourselves to get caught up in differences. We look at others that express themselves in a way that doesn't seem to be socially appropriate and we push them away. We yell at them or tell them to get lost. We ignore them and don't want to be bothered with their random chatter. Today, I was blessed because I saw someone forget what society says and love a man for WHO HE IS. I am so thankful for the ones in our small town that show  love and support for those that are "different."

Jennifer's Learning to Correct her Mistakes...

Lately our sweet Jennifer has been making some changes. She's really starting to learn how to "fix" things that may not align with her desired outcome. Example: Last week she brought home an 80 on a test about the regions of SC. Apparently, she didn't agree with her teacher's idea of correct answers. So, she decided to mark through the 80 and give herself a 100! Earlier in the week, due to Jennifer coming home with tallies every day, I spoke with her about behavior expectations and the consequences for tallies. We set different punishments for 1, 2, 3, and 4 or more tallies. Today, she received 4 tallies for not being compliant at school. She's never gotten 4 tallies! When she came into my office this afternoon, I asked to see her agenda as usual. She smiled that cute, sweet smile at me and told me that she got 1 tally. Upon inspection, I realize that she wrote over the 4 and changed it to a 1. When Grandma asked her about it, this evening. Jennifer said, "I don't like 4. I like 1!"  WOW! This little girl of mine never ceases to amaze me. I love her to pieces!!

2013-2014: New School Year, New Challenges

This school year has already been filled with an emotional roller coaster. I'm excited that my children are growing up and enjoy watching them grow. I'm sad that they're growing much faster than I would like. My boys, especially, seem to grow rather quickly. 

Nicholas was just beginning to crawl a month ago. Now, he's pulling up on everything and even mustering up the courage to let go occasionally. 

Jonathan's taking advanced classes in his sophomore year of high school and he's just become a licensed driver. Jennifer's growth has always been much slower paced. I love that I can't blink and miss her development. She get things in her own time and watching her grow is such a joy. Third grade has already become a challenge, but I just know she'll get it.

We're really focusing on plans for Jennifer's academic future. Currently, she is mainstreamed and pulled out for math and reading support. She has an aide that helps her during her in class math, writing, science and social studies time. We've pushed her aide away some to try and get a more accurate assessment of what all Jennifer can/cannot do independently. I already see that she's not able to maintain the focus needed for this crucial year. That being said, at what time do we have her aide begin helping more? I don't want her to fall behind just so we can prove a point.

I feel like every week I'm learning more about Jennifer and, therefore, want to make more appropriate accommodations for her. I, also, don't want to be one of those nagging parents that the school dreads. 

Our situation is unique in that I'm not only a parent. I'm also a coworker. That leads to a whole new level of anxiety for me when I ask for things. 

Am I asking too much? Is this really appropriate? Will this accommodation work in the classroom? Do my coworkers/friends think I'm nuts? Am I really doing everything I can for my daughter? Is she handling the work load okay? Am I asking too much of her? Is it time to back off? Is it time for modified curriculum? Will that mean a self contained classroom? As crazy as these questions may sound to some, these are the questions I ask myself every single day. These are the questions that haunt my dreams. 

The only way I know to find the answers is to put Jennifer to the test. Her homework takes a while, but she's ready for the challenge and stays engaged. When I ask her if her work is too hard, she quickly tells me no. She wants to do the things her classmates are doing and usually tries her very best. She's a perfectionist and will not stop until she's got it right.

Since last school year, I have lived every single day with the fear of being told to put her on modified curriculum. I don't believe that a child so eager to learn should be sold short. One IQ test cannot give an accurate measurement of Jennifer. She is more than a stupid number! 

I watch her strive every day to learn something new. She's excited about meeting milestones. She LOVES to read! These traits make me feel even more strongly that I'm not ready to stop challenging my daughter. She meets new challenges every day with a smile on her face. Does she find success on the path society had set? NO! Does she find it, though? Absolutely! 

Although, I'm in the middle of one driving, one learning to walk and another learning to learn, I love my life! Being a mother is my greatest joy. Just like my children, some days I seem to conquer things faster than others. No matter what, I'm ready and eager to keep pushing and doing exactly what I need for all three of my babies.